‘23 Adjustments

It's about that time; actually, it's a few weeks past that time. It is crazy we've crossed the threshold at the halfway point of 2023. I want to look back at the goals I made for myself this year. But let's not just look back. Life is a balance, a constant shuffle of trial and error, sowing and reaping. That's why I've got some tweaks in mind, subtle shifts in my daily routine and discipline. I've learned progress is more about the adjustments you make when new or better information is presented to you. 

Recently, my wife and I got back our results from extensive blood tests we did earlier in the summer. This was done through Function Health, which I believe is worth every dollar spent. I have much to say about our healthcare system, but I will leave that for another time. Back to the results, mine were a mixed bag, but for the important things, they could have been better. But here is the thing, I am a very disciplined person in most areas of my life. I make good decisions with my diet, and I workout, often. You would look at me and in no way say I am unhealthy. But, my blood tests say otherwise. 

Over twenty years ago, I had surgery to remove my parathyroids, and since then, I have been diagnosed with Hashimoto's hypothyroidism. In a lot of ways, I do the right things in life. This is where the conflict in worldview lies; there are things you can control (diet, exercise, etc.) and things you cannot control. Well, I cannot necessarily prevent my thyroid issues, I can only do my best to manage them. In a lot of ways, I am swimming upstream against a powerful current. I cannot control how strong the currents are at times, but I can control the strategy in which I swim in them. 

When I first saw the results, my immediate reaction was anxiety. Deep anxiety. Not so much because of the results, I honestly kinda expected them, but because it was one of those few moments in time when you are confronted head-on with your own mortality. I do the right things, for the most part, but even in that, my body is heading full throttle to its demise. Most days, we do not entertain this reality at a conscious level. This day, I did. 

If you know me, you understand I usually react to unwelcome news and conflict basically the same. First, anxiety stops by to say hello, and I sit with it for a bit; then, it's time to go to war. I usually have no issues engaging with uncomfortable things. It takes me a minute, but I'm mostly willing. A little caveat: as I've gotten older, I've begun to filter out most things that don't warrant my time and energy; just because it asks for it doesn't mean it deserves it. Well, I think my health and the quality of my life deserve my full attention. 

So, in light of this year's halftime, I wanted to make some adjustments to what I am focusing on while looking back at what I felt was necessary at the beginning of the year. These blood results have partly motivated me to be more specific and intentional in what I am doing with my life. First, let's look back:

The first goal was to create more than I consume for myself and be an example for my kids because I hope to see them do the same. I've succeeded in doing this. Writing has been the main focus of my creation, and I've done this well. I am now disciplined in this area, which is a part of my routine. 

Next, create and seek fun environments for myself and my family. I want to laugh more. Not a "ha ha" laugh, but a belly laugh. We've done this well as a family for what's been possible. We've prioritized several moments to ensure we've had fun together the first six months of this year. It is definitely more challenging during the school year from an energy level and time perspective. While true, it doesn't mean we lay down and accept it.

Next up, talk less and listen more. I have no way to measure this, but overall, I feel I've been able to approach most environments this way. Part of this has been recognizing how little my opinion really matters and recognizing if and when value is actually placed on it. It's been freeing to approach many interactions this way. I really do hope I am listening more. 

Start a business. I have not done this, but the process has begun. This will take time and will not be forced. 

Look to eliminate anxiety. Stop trying to change things I have no control over or responsibility for. I've made significant progress here. Anxiety is a part of life for us all, but I now accept it as just a part of a process. I no longer let it control me, or feel it foreign to experience. I've come to recognize how much of my life I cannot control and focus on what I can. Even more clearly, I've come to acknowledge I cannot control much of anything external, both humans and events. Most of the time, things just are. 

That was a look back; it's time to make some adjustments moving forward. Here are some very specific ways I am doing so, immediately and why:

Writing. I have already found consistency in my writing. This is my current way of creating. I enjoy it. It's incredibly therapeutic for me. My plan is to get more specific and intentional in my approach. Beginning in August, I plan to write daily about whatever is on my mind. How I specifically achieve this will depend on the day. With the daily writing, I plan to include a picture taken from that day as well. I love writing, I love photography, and I wouldn't say I like social media, so my goal is to do something each day that is tangible to both and put them here. Second, I will write a more lengthy perspective of mine four times a month as I currently do within my routine. I like sitting with ideas, and this format allows just that. Nothing will change here. Lastly, the book. I will begin to schedule writing sessions solely focused on completing the book Lynn, and I have set out to write. I've narrowed down my goal of creating within these three avenues. 

Next, I will jump rope 5 days a week, 20 minutes daily. This is a motivation stemming from my biomarkers. I am very disciplined in my approach to strength training and, usually, cardio. But my lifestyle in Colorado is much different than it was in New York. I walk significantly less. While walking is a big part of my exercise routine, adding 20 minutes of jump rope will only enhance my health and, more importantly, my discipline. I am getting older, so it takes more effort to stay where I want to be. It's a hard lesson in aging. 

Read. When it comes to reading, I am usually all over the place. I read a lot in seasons and won't read at all in seasons. I need to be more consistent. Reading helps me learn, and I love learning. I often see people give up learning new things as they age. I could rant about this, but again, I only control what I do. So, I want to continue to be a learner. I don't want to use age as an excuse. 

I will focus more on my internal health: This one is tricky. I've mostly done all the right things for the most part. But I know I can improve. I got a bit lazy with my medications, which, in turn, has affected my health. This is the hand I've been dealt, so it is what it is. I need to navigate the currents better than I have as of late. I will tighten up in areas I know I can, and look forward to the outcomes it may provide months from now. I cannot base my health solely on what I see in the mirror. It is not always accurate. 

And finally, I've implemented this over the last several weeks; I will ensure I do it daily. I call it hugs all around. Physical touch and embracing your loved ones are essential. I even read an article that correlated an NBA team's success throughout the season by how often they embraced each other on the court. Interesting. So, every day, I will hug my kids. Each of them will feel their dad embrace them in his arms. They will know they are loved, not only by words but by appropriate affection. This does two things: knowing hugs are coming lowers tension in moments of conflict. We don't have that often, but when we do, those are the exact moments I like to employ the hug for my benefit, and there's. Two, it helps recalibrate perspective. These are the people I love the most, and too often, we go about our day in a state of autopilot and neglect to acknowledge this. It helps humanize one another and makes people more emphatic towards one another. 

As for my wife, I also want to include her in this, but I will use it to make her more aware of how we show affection. The hug is the starting point, not just the box to check. It's not enough to hug once a day. But we all know how easy it is to neglect affection, even to those we love the most. I love her the most, and I want to make sure she knows that day in and day out through my actions towards her.