Embracing Strengths, Finding Purpose

Throughout my life, I've believed that downplaying my abilities was a form of humility. Whether this mindset was instilled in me by others or self-engineered, I am not really sure. However, I no longer hold this view. With time and experience, I've come to understand the actual characteristics of humility and what it looks like in myself and those around me. At the same time, I've realized the importance of acknowledging and embracing my strengths.

From my perspective, a great deal of life's anxiety comes from uncertainty about our abilities and our elusive search for purpose. At a deep level, we all desire to know our purpose; sometimes, we may feel that it is only reserved for a select few. Yet, I think that our purpose might be closely tied to our passions and strengths. These can be natural gifts, skills we've developed and honed over time, or a mix of both.

In the past, I've often shelved personal ambitions, preferring to remain more in the background. This was a conscious choice, entirely my own. I value my privacy and enjoy working behind the scenes, strategizing behind the scenes rather than being out front. While I maintain this preference, it is no longer at the cost of limiting opportunities to contribute in a manner that utilizes my giftings. I often reflect on the parable of the talents, and I've come to believe that using our gifts is the path to satisfaction, purpose, and fulfillment. The tragedy lies not in who has more but in not utilizing what we have.

This leads me to my thoughts on education. I believe our educational system should better assist students in discovering their passions and talents. Especially now, with readily available information, schools should shift from merely learning to exploring. It would be best to learn about what interests you and everything else you can find online. My kids are in the middle of this machine we can school now, and I will admit its gotten a lot better than when I was a kid. While I won't delve deep into my critique of the education system here, I firmly believe that how we develop our kids needs significant change. After all, kids spend most of their formative years within the system yet often discover their passions outside it.

Looking back, I regret not exploring my dormant interests sooner. I'm only beginning to explore them now, as there was no clear path for me during my school years. This is why I believe in the importance of mentorship from a young age. I take responsibility for all of my decisions, but I would like to have a mulligan on this one. I didn't have one, but I should have. Sometimes, people see potential in us before we recognize it in ourselves. This can be useful, and this is where this younger generation has such an opportunity. They can now learn from anyone at any time, thanks to technology. NASA did not have a YouTube channel when I was in school. How could it? YouTube didn't exist. I graduated high school in 2001, and Google's search engine was launched in 1998. Fun fact: "Google" was first added to the Merriam-Webster's Collegiate dictionary in 2006. I am old.

It's clear to me that people who discover and harness their strengths early often find their purpose sooner. Because of that, I've become a strong advocate for personality and strength tests. These tools can help us identify and understand our strengths and how to effectively use them, whether on our own or as part of a team. A few years back, through my work, I spent several hours learning about our staff's individual strengths and the makeup of our teams using the Enneagram. It felt like the entire universe finally made sense to me that day. I made sense to myself! Ideally, we prefer to engage in activities we enjoy, maximize our strengths, and surround ourselves with like-minded individuals. This is what makes being part of a team so enjoyable. Chemistry comes from knowing and operating in your strengths, together with others. The first step is to know them and then to use them. Denying them is not a form of humility. A few years ago, I never said, "Hey, I want to do this because I am the best at it." Doing this may not pan out, but I am beginning to believe we should all have the confidence and emotional intelligence to know what this is and, just as important, what this isn't. 

My journey of exploration has led me to identify areas where I excel and the things that genuinely bring me joy and fulfillment. I've begun to look for environments where I can use these strengths and find ways to apply them better in the situations I find myself in. As the world evolves, I aim to further explore these interests, enjoy learning, and enjoy all life offers. This involves focusing on my strengths, using them, and continuing to learn and discover new things. My advice for my children closely reflects this perspective: Pursue your passions, develop your strengths, and don't wait for anyone's permission to utilize them. Rather than depending on others to identify your strengths and purpose, seek guidance from those who can help you refine them and use them purposefully. Maybe the purpose you desire is directly tied to the gifts you've been given; consider starting there.