Selective Engagement

In the current climate of our information—and content-rich economy, where ideas and opinions are communicated at an unprecedented pace, it's too easy for me to feel the need to think about every topic that I am exposed to. So, I am beginning to recognize my need for selective engagement.

Maybe it's because of my personality, but I am increasingly exhausted from receiving and contributing opinions, even when the subject matter pertains to me. Over the last couple of years, its become essential that I was more conscious of how often I participate in these discussions and sincerely evaluate their significance in my life.

Consider all the topics that constantly vie for our attention—politics, education, workplace dynamics, and the endless barrage of current events. These subjects inundate us, each begging us to consider them meaningful to our lives. Yet, if we were to take a step back and objectively assess these issues, we might find that many of them have little to no bearing on our personal lives whatsoever. 

Engaging in this type of reflection, or filtering process, requires us to sift through the noise and pinpoint the things that truly resonate with our values and contribute to our growth. This season has invited me to reassess my engagement habits with the people and things I alone assign meaning to and find beneficial.

My propensity has always been to jump at the chance to discuss and debate a subject, to air my perspectives. But as I've gotten older, I have come to recognize that any form of engagement drains not only time but energy as well—resources that, if not managed well, can lead to anxiety or mental exhaustion. Looking back, I can acknowledge that a lot of my attention, in the grand scheme of life, have been given to things inconsequential and detrimental to my well-being. 

This journey is not just about recusing myself from life's discussions but steering my time and energy toward the things that challenge and inspire me. I enjoy learning, debating, and being challenged to consider my viewpoints and think deeper, but equally, I have the ability to respond thoughtfully, with space for understanding. This means engaging with people who offer mutual respect and genuine interest. Most environments do not lend themselves to this type of mutual interaction, so it's best to leave them to themselves. 

Recently, I've struggled immensely with the need to be heard, which led me to participate in every discussion around me, whether asked to or not. Now, I find peace in opting for silence. Even if a question is addressed to me directly, I am not obligated to communicate my innermost thoughts or expound in real depth.

At this time in my life, what truly matters is contributing constructively to the conversations I elect to participate in and gauging whether my contributions are valued. Absent this reciprocal exchange of value, I am disciplined enough to keep my thoughts to myself most days. This consideration brings me back to the strategy of selective engagement, which has now become an essential part of my life.