When No One Listens

"Homeland" is hands down my favorite TV show created. Why? Because if I had a second life, being in intelligence is what I'd want to do in that life. I've been rewatching the last season, Season 8, which I believe is the best. A scene takes place in Season 8, Episode 5, where Saul Berenson, the National Security Advisor at the time, has been working on a complex plan for peace in Afghanistan. However, due to various unforeseen factors, crap hitting the fan, his plan starts to unravel, causing chaos and uncertainty. Despite his expertise and careful consideration in his decision-making process, decisions that undermine his authority and the comprehensive understanding he possesses of the situation unfolding are now being made.

During this time, Carrie Mathison, the central character and Saul's advisor, questions Saul about the changing circumstances in the decision-making process. She points out that he previously emphasized the importance of understanding the reasons behind certain events and why it matters for what you do next, but now his focus has shifted. Carrie asks him why this change occurred, prompting Saul's frustrated response: "What happened is that no one is listening to me." This moment highlights Saul's frustration and challenges when his expertise and insights seem to be disregarded amid unfolding events. It's a great scene, and as always, perfectly written and excellently acted. 

That line stuck with me, "what happened is that no one is listening to me." It got me thinking. I am confident we've all felt like Saul in this situation. We understand what's happening, but you feel ignored. We might believe people should listen to us, but does that mean they will, or even should? It's more complex than it seems.

Sometimes, maybe there's a good reason no one is listening. Perhaps we need to see the whole picture, or we're making a bigger deal out of our opinions than we should. Perhaps our past ideas are impacting the validity of our current ones, or maybe people don't care about what we're saying. Feeling ignored doesn't automatically mean we deserve attention. And honestly, there are days when we feel ignored, which might be our own doing.

On the flip side, maybe people should listen. Perhaps we have great ideas or a helpful perspective, but they're ignored or disregarded. Perhaps we have layers of context and understanding that others do not. Maybe we're surrounded by people who don't understand that but are in charge. Some days, it's easy to relate to Saul. Because the path forward seems so clear. 

It's a real struggle we all face. When do we decide to let go and accept that our thoughts aren't important? When should we ensure our voice is heard, even if we don't get the desired outcome? Then there are those times when it just doesn't matter. It's not personal; there's just nothing we can do. Sometimes, the machine takes over. This scene is like a mirror reflecting life's complexities – decision making, the process of decision making, seeing things from different angles, the chain of command, relationship dynamics, internal debate, and disagreement, prioritizing someone's perspective over someone else's, knowing and accepting your place, things all humans deal with.

There will be moments when we're right to be ignored. At other times, we deserve to be heard but won't be. That's life. All we can control is ourselves and how we react in these situations. Just like Saul navigates his world of intelligence, we navigate our lives, juggling the tension between being unnoticed and demanding attention. But remember that we are often on the other side of this equation, determining who we do and do not listen to. I focus a lot more these days on filtering who I listen to and not so much on who is listening to me. One I control, the other I do not. Regardless of the side of the dynamic we fall on at any given time, humility is usually the best path forward.